Let's Give Them Something to Talk About

This is about to get awkward and maybe even a little uncomfortable, but perhaps it's time we all grow up a little. 

Vagina. 

Uterus. 

Ovary.  

Menstruation. 

Period.

Birth Control. 

 Fallopian Tubes.

Endometriosis.

We won't say the words. We won't say the word. It is a series of words that are uncomfortable and it can be embarrassing . I remember when I would have to miss class due to pain. I would almost instantly feel the dread of having to explain my absence to friends and teachers. I would sit and try to rephrase the fact that my ovaries had been twisting up inside my body because I had started my period and my cramps left me unable to walk. 

"I had a stomach ache."

"I was feeling under the weather"

"I got a stomach bug"

"Ok."

How do you explain having a stomach ache like clock work every month for 5 to 7 days leaving you suddenly MIA? 

How do you complain about the symptoms and listen to your friends offer suggestions of relief when in your mind you know the real answer...

Or worse, you don't, but you know you can't ask for help because, well, that would be an awkward conversation. 

Nobody wants to talk about periods. 

I remember working out and seeing a commercial for a pad that helps "protect the panties" and the woman beside me going "that is such an awkward commercial, I have to turn it if I am with other people."

Yeah, but find me one woman who hasn't had that problem before or at least thought to herself in that one heart stopping moment she might have bled through her clothes. The horror and humiliation that comes from simply sitting down a little to long. 

Heck, when you have Endo it's pretty much a guarantee. 

IT HAPPENS. 

We won't talk about that kind of stuff in public. Yeah, maybe you complain to your girlfriends about your cramps or ask to borrow a tampon cause you forgot, but when is the last time you sat down and had a serious conversation with someone about having severe pain and cramping during your period. It just doesn't happen.

Why does Endometriosis have such a high infertility rate? Because the average age we catch it at is 32, the time we begin trying for children. 

We don't know about it because we don't hear about it. 

We don't talk about it. We don't learn about it. 

For some the silence steals away the ability for them to have children. 

More than 5 Million Women in the US ALONE have been diagnosed Endometriosis.  

In 2011 a study conducted by the Eunice Kennedy Shriver National Institute of Child Health and Human Development had a group of 652 randomly selected women  undergo a Lapro to look at their reproductive organs for signs of Endo, of that group 11% were diagnosed without having any showing symptoms of the disease. This just goes to show how much higher this 5 million is more likely to be.

Since Endometriosis cannot be seen in an Ultrasound or MRI it is difficult to diagnose or even know you have it without symptoms.

What is important to look at is family history, Endometriosis is hereditary. My mother had it and so did other female family members. Look at your mom, aunts, grandmothers, cousins, even great grandmothers. Do your research on family history, and don't just look for the magical "endometriosis" to be printed on paper for you to be sure. You need to look at fertility problems and reasons for hysterectomies.

As women with Endometriosis we need to talk about it. I am so passionate about informing all my female relatives and friends about my disease. I even put on an art show at my college about it and opened it to the public for everyone to come see photographs of me in my most vulnerable. I wrote about it online, I posted about it on Facebook, I even shared photos leading up to surgery. Why? Because since then I have had 17 women reach out to me wanting to talk back. I have had women ask me about symptoms, share with me their stories of pain. I have had women who have been diagnosed recently sharing with me their fear. I have had women ask me about my procedure and what to expect. 

Because I want to open a door to make it okay to talk about it. 

Because when someone ask "What happened?" or "Why are you in the hospital?" 

I want it to be okay to say "Because I have Endometriosis." 

"Because I had to have an ovary removed because of Endometriosis"

Knowing our body gives us power and avoiding topics because we are embarrassed or it awkward leaves us vulnerable. 

Start the conversation and watch what happens. 

This needs to be a bigger issue. We can televise 10 Viagra commercials during one football game sitting next to our dads or sing a song about someone's "Anaconda", but we can't say "ovaries" and we can't say "uterus" without a shush or a joke to follow. 

Well those ovaries and that uterus gave us mankind.

I'm not making this a feminist issue, I'm making this a maturity issue. We need to stop thinking of these things as "gross girly parts" or the reason for "shark week" and begin to see them as vital organs to reproduction. Hormones conduct our entire body. Not only that, but Endometriosis can attach to more than just your reproductive organs. I had it on my stomach, appendix, bowls and abdomen. 

When we become aware of Endometriosis we will better understand it. We will better be able to detect it and we may even begin to find a cure. 

Don't be afraid to share your story. There is always someone out there who is thankful to be listening, trust me. 

And if you do worry about having Endometriosis or want to know about the symptoms, but know that those around you cannot provide that type of platform for conversation never be afraid to seek or reach out to those who could. Never let the conversation end because nobody will listen. 

To end this post I would like to say I would never ask any woman to force herself to share with others what she didn't feel comfortable with about her own personal story. I understand that what comes with Endometriosis can be mentally, physically and emotionally daunting. The details of your story is your choice to decided what to keep private. You don't need to share the details of your own story to share the topic of Endometriosis, the awareness of Endometriosis itself could take us miles. We cannot be afraid of talking about Endometriosis. 

You are no less a woman. You are no less a person. You are not weak. You are not crazy. You are not different. You are not broken.

You are strong. You are brave. You are a fighter.

 Let them hear you roar.